Being grateful: For Thanksgiving, don’t focus on your imperfections

One of the themes of the Thanksgiving holiday is expressing gratitude for our blessings, good fortune, and, generally, all the things going right in our lives.

This notion shares some common ground with those working a program of recovery. Many people in recovery list the things they are grateful for daily in a journal or in meditation or prayer.

I like the idea of stopping, even for a moment, to remind ourselves that even during our darkest days, we will find some peace when we stop and recognize what is going right instead of focusing on all that is going wrong.

This week, I have chosen to share my gratitude with my readers:

I am thankful for the time I had with each person I’ve lost this year – the step-father who loved me and mine fiercely, the friend who believed in me and was always straightforward, the mother-in-law that made the best jellies and breads and was always ready to gather the family.

I am grateful for the four years I had with my dog Jackson before he passed away.

I am grateful for the health of my family while so many others are fighting this virus.

I am grateful that I am still employed while so many others are struggling, hand-to-mouth, during this very trying pandemic.

I am grateful for small acts of kindness: a friend reaching out, a neighbor helping fix things around the house, my doctor’s kind eyes and empathetic bedside manner, a passerby telling me how my writing has encouraged them.

I am grateful that there are people in our community who are true helpers: they feed the poor, offer rides to those with none, and check on their neighbors.

I am grateful for the encouragers: those who send a text or make a call or shout from across the street, “Hello, friend!”

I am grateful for the community servants: medical professionals, officials, law enforcement, linemen, and volunteers risking their own safety and wellness to keep me, my family, and the community I love safe and healthy despite ourselves.

I am grateful for shared tears, shared frustrations, and human kindnesses that hold this community together.

Today, I am grateful for every struggle I have encountered; that pain and that journey brought me to this moment and created the woman, mother, daughter, friend, significant other, community member, and employee I am today.

The struggle is what makes the journey so worthwhile, in my opinion. Like they say in recovery, “The view from the mountaintop is much more beautiful when you’ve walked through the valleys.”

I encourage you to take time to think of the things you are grateful for rather than focusing on all of the things that are not perfect at this time.

Remember, the view may be better on top of the mountain, but the valley teaches and shapes us. I wish everyone a safe and Happy Thanksgiving.

Sarah Mears-Ivy brings 12 years of experience in the field of human sciences and advocacy.